My Normal

Normal feels easy
Normal has a pattern
Normal is routine
Normal has no surprises
Normal is predictable
Normal is everyday

Normal is coffee, eating, cleaning, showering, dressing, cooking, loving, talking, working…living the ordinary, everyday, boring, simple life.

Normal feels comfortable
Normal has no emotion
Normal is plain
Normal is a gift

Normal is groceries, bills, paychecks, treats, dates, sleeping, waking, playing…living the ordinary, everyday, boring, simple life.

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Friday the Thirteenth

A silly comment was made
A meaningless joke…
I smile at the imagery my mind has created.

Defending her…
It’s suddenly all that’s on my mind…
My heart races equally as my thoughts.

It wasn’t her…
It was me.
My mind and heart now pounded in confusion.

Defending myself…
My thoughts now frantic
This is not who I am.

A good person is who I am.
With words far less eloquent than these…
My stomach burns with rage.

Desperate for understanding
Aching for the relief of being defended…
Doubled over in pain, I try to breathe.

My heart and mind continue to race
Now focused on the intense twisting of my abdomen
I make it home.

Horizontal on the couch
A pill is delivered.
The television absorbs my thoughts.

Body heavy and warm
Eyelids at half mass
These people know who I am.

My mind is no longer racing.
My body is relaxed.
Relief sets in…

Until morning.